I am feeling a bit cynical this evening, pumpkins, and for that, I apologize; I think that my internal struggle with cynicism may have influenced this week's intellectual proposition. I shall let you be the judge, however, as to whether or not this was a good or a bad thing.
As many of you know, and if you didn't you do now, I am not that into people. There are a select few I would ever willingly share time with, and more often than not, it shows. Now, before I go any further, I feel it pertinent to actually define what I mean when I say "people." So, here it goes, for lack of a more...academic definition: PEOPLE: Individuals who are not kids or animals, mostly over the age of 25 and under the age of 80.
And there you have it--the definition of people in the world of Cassie Bunje.
This rather pessimistic and certainly asocial view of the human race is not something with which I was born, however, I feel that it began cultivating itself at a rather young age. My childhood was not one to be looked back upon wistfully, and it didn't really get much better as I grew into young adulthood. This was due, almost entirely, to my interactions with and observations of, you guessed it--people. In fact, until I became a teacher, I held out very little hope that I would ever be able to gaze upon the face of another human being without a hint of scorn, mistrust or distaste. True story. Truth be told, and this is not me being dramatic at all--you could probably accurately say that teaching saved my soul. More on that later.
So, in my reading today, I happened upon an interesting quote. I would like you to read and reflect on this quote and tell me what you come up with in terms of whether or not you agree with what it says, and what it even means. As always, qualify your answer with an anecdote of personal experience to help illustrate the point you are making.
Here it is:
"Niceness is a decision. It is a strategy of social interaction; it is not a character trait."
Have fun, poppets...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
OH.EM.GEE! this is being completely typed from my mobile, so its texted. I AM NOT FAILING JUNIOR ENGLISH AGAIN! lol, anyways.. this quote is from the gift of fear.. i liked that book. =]
ReplyDeleteI personally agree with this quote, because one, you truly dont have to be nice to anyone. I actually am only nice to people when I want something, because, i actually want to take over the world haha & people seeking to control others always present the image of a nice person in the beginning... =] in ever movie, even in the book staying fat for sarah byrnes, julie def, had to have seen a nice side of virgil because she couldn't have been that dumb to marry a complete phsyco, i mean seriously.. & alsooo i think everyone eles is like that (not as horrible as he is.. just in the way that everyone's nice when they want something)because, i'm not going to say names but a certain someone i'ma say SHE'S A HE & HE is in our class... & he only talks to me when he wants some advice because, i am how you say insightful & he only comments me, on facebook/myspace when he's bored, which only makes me think, we're only friends when he has no one eles, which isn't how i operate, i know i'm pretty much hypocrite because, i'm not going to lie, i do the same exact thing to my mother & siblings- i'm pretty much an outcast in my house so when i'm talking to you & being kind, asking how your day went & such, I WANT something, unless, i completly like you... so there you are, i agree with that statement. Niceness IS a decision.
grrrrr. i forgottt a part. in every movie like, the devils advocate, the devil (John Milton) was nice as cheese did massive amounts of things for his advocate, (Kevin Lomax) before kevin saw his true colors, the same in Mr. Deeds that guy who wanted to take over his 'uncle's company was nice to him & did things for him only to turn on him in the end. & i could go on, but i'm going to get carpal tunnel dyndrome, so this is goodbye... =]
ReplyDeleteI do not agree with this quote. I believe niceness is a character trait. I believe it is a character trait because it is something that is a part of your personality. It is true that niceness is a decision that you choose to do, but it is a trait that people posess. Some people in our world are just mean people, they don’t have an once of niceness in them. It sometimes isn’t these peoples decision to be nice or mean to someone. Maybe they were just born with the trait where you can’t be nice to anyone or you can only be nice to people.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI’m not agree with this quote, it doesn’t even apply with my personality. I consider myself a nice person, I was born with that trait, I’m very nice to people, only if I like you, so yea being nice to people is a decision, because I’m not nice to everyone. But when I’m nice I’m not faking it, so I can take advantage of that, is just the way I am and how my family raised me. Some people don’t even have a 1% of niceness in their personality, and they just act good to people when they want something, but I think that’s because they are angry with the life they have or something bad happened to them in the past, and they want to take revenge by not acting nice to anyone, they don’t even can be nice to themselves. So being nice is definitely a character trait, for some people. If people is nice to me, they obviously will know that I will treat them the same, because how you act around me is how I will act towards you. I hate fake people, so is better not being nice to someone, than faking niceness and acting like someone you are not. Is either black or white.
ReplyDeleteFor example, my cousin never acts nice towards me, but there are days when she starts to treat me like a “princess”, so I automatically know that she wants something, and I hate that because it looks so fake. That’s why I don’t treat her that good. What she gives me is what she is going to receive.
I’m not going to lie, but sometimes I am nice to someone when I really want something, so I do whatever it takes to get it. Sometimes we got to be someone we are not in order to achieve a goal. So this quote applies in some cases. I am a very nice person once you get to know me.
"Niceness is a decision. It is a strategy of social interaction; it is not a character trait."
ReplyDeleteI believe that niceness is both some people can just naturally be nice me on the other hand I am a very mean person I don’t like anyone and I don’t give anyone a chance until proven other wise I have my select few and that’s not many I am not a people person its all about me like whattt lol any way I think that I am this way because I have been stabbed in the back so many times and my theory hasn’t been proved wrong yet so I guess I am almost all the way right everyone is different but me I just don’t like being around a lot of people I am a very strait forward person if I don’t like you or I think your fake or a lier you will always no how I feel because I am not scared to tell you I’ve been through so much shit in my almost 17 years that I only fear death and defeat so
I agree
ReplyDeleteThat’s stating you have the choice to choose, which is a disicion
So you can be mad,
But you can push yourself to be happy and nice, giving and caring to other people even if you’re not in the best of moods. Yes it can be a life long trait, but I don’t believe someone can be nice forever. Everyone in my head, has a breaking point, a climax to the niceness, then its down hill it can’t just climax and be there forever in my eyes, yet this is just a belief of mine, and beliefs is what starts wars, fights, makes peace, and love. So I believe niceness is just a act you yourself choose to do.
I agree that niceness Is a decision. This is so true even if you have to fake it because it cant be a characteristic if it was a characteristic because if it was you would have to be mad all the time. Its things that happen around you that make you decide to be mad. There’s sometimes where you let things slide and you make that decision not change you characteristic. I remember one time when I was at the jail waiting to visit my brother and a cop said something rude to me normally I would make a decision to say something back but I sucked it up and let it slide. If I had a characteristic to say a comment back I would not be able to control myself and I would have said a rude remark back. People make decisions all the time to be mad but you can just as easily make a decision to be happy. Also being mad is an emotion not a characteristic. A characteristic is a trait that you carry that you cant change like Sarah Byrnes one of her characteristics was to have scares all on her face that’s not something she can change. You can have characteristics that make you made but mad isn’t a characteristic like your could have bipolar and that can lead to you being mad but mad isn’t a characteristic.
ReplyDeleteIn my eyes I believe that niceness is a decision people inherit through out their lives. I think it depends on their backgrounds like their friends, family, child hood, etc. I’m not going to say any names but I know a friend that does not know how to act around people. Like we were talking about in class, he is socially awkward. I have never seen him being actually nice to anyone. Someone can’t just be nice out of no where, it is showing that they are fake. I believe it takes a while for someone to actually be nice. I also think it all depends on who your being nice to as well.
ReplyDeletewell the way i see this quote is its a whole lot easier to do something wrong then it is to do something right for instance. your on the bus in your seat and an old lady gets on the bus there are no more seats the nice thing to do is give her your seat but if your not a kind hearted person like i you'd let her stand and go on about your day. or in another case charity or good will these are things you dont have to do but you do them outta of the kindness of your heart the will to give someone less fortunate then yourself something nice.
ReplyDelete"Niceness is a decision. It is a strategy of social interaction; it is not a character trait."
ReplyDeleteMany people say some people are just born nice… Others have said that niceness is like any other skill you have to learn how to and practice and you will then get better at being nice.
But since I am not most people and I almost always disagree and have a different opinion then everyone else I think niceness really is a decision…
Like for instance, if you are on the bus with a huge bag of gummy warms (the sour kind) and some random kid gets on the bus and sits with you and you start talking… And your thinking to yourself “Dam these are REALLY GOOD” should I share and not have as much or should I just keep all them to myself mmmm?
…Perfect example of niceness being a decision.
Regardless of what people say, when they are like oh I wasn’t thinking when they do something bad or when they are like oh I didn’t mean to be mean. Almost all of us know the difference between being rude or mean/ kind or nice.
From the time you were able to walk and talk, or since you have been in kindergarten you were always taught to treat others the way you want to be treated… But we all know there have been times that we haven’t…
Life is full of choices, some harder then others, some less important then others, some effect your life more then others… What I am trying to get at is, Life if full of choices and the way you treat people and you actions are also a part of it.
This small quote has so much meaning and says a lot.
My interpretation of this quote is… Your character says a lot about you, the way you act the way you talk, the way you treat other people etc. Whether you are nice to the people around you are not is your choice.
… So in the end, yes I agree with this quote.
It’s very true that being nice is a decision in someone’s life. Some days my parents come home from work and they say that they are tired of being nice to others. And my parents would do anything for anyone if they needed the help. And I even think about it a lot myself. Of how I go to school and might help someone or not walk into everyone like the big guys, I move so people can get through and you have that one person that gets in your face just for doing something nice. He gets in your face for bumping into him and he is so big he wants to fight then and there. But at all I could really think about one this post because if I am in a bad mood or not feeling well I will still be nice to whoever it is or if they need my help or others.
ReplyDeleteyes being nice is a decision i know this because ive tryed being nice all the time and most of the time it end the same way. With me geting steped on for some one else but there is only so much a person can take before the decision is out of your hands and turned to anger. I was being nice to make friends, but the nicer i was the more people took me for a punk. now by character trait do mean people are born nice then no not at all i have a friend who i swear on all that i love has never been nice not even one time. The world is a mean place being nice is only gonna set you back. Now iam not saying be mean Iam just saying dont let your guard down.
ReplyDelete